Your work is to discover your world and then with all your heart give yourself to it – Buddha
When I was a little girl, I dreamed a dream. I would lie in bed at night and………decorate my future house, and go about living happily as an adult, meandering through all kinds of scenarios, falling in love, travelling to Paris ………..
I would indulge myself before I would go to sleep with plans and visions for when I grew up. I would also do some planning for my immediate life….
……I would make whole wardrobes for my dolls and later I would press my Nana to bring them into form. Her devotion, indulgence, skill and creativity were amazing. I knew, like no other adult in my life at the time, that she was truly present with me. I knew that she was love in action. She was an anchor of attention and nurture, in a sea of ordinary. Filled up with this love, I would dance delightedly with her creations. My doll would have easily been the best dressed on the street, if not in the whole town. My Nana, also did other wonderful things, like make whole rag dolls, complete with hair, faces, freckles, fancy dresses and matching bloomers..
An imaginary dream-scape was built in multiple facets of my future self’s life all before falling sleep, with an accompanying weird sense of fulfillment. Some nights it was super cold, freezing in my bed. Too cold to get up to get my hottie filled and I would distract myself with my marvelous future dreams.
I was certainly planning a bright future then. As I grew into a teenager, I felt that I had the whole world to conquer. I was torn between Accounting and Dress Design. The Accounting became my career and the Dress Design, became my passion with numerous fashion design finalist entries to my name and a win at the Montana Fashion Design award, where I won in among 27 entries from the Wellington Wearable Art Competition of the same year.
It wasn’t only what I was to do by day, but what I would do as a career and other dreams, other ambitions, like living happily ever after with multiple life successes and fulfillment’s.
You will have similar experiences. Dreaming of growing up and conquering the world. All uniquely tailored to your developing skills and how you were molded within your upbringing and beyond. Childhood aspirations.
It would seem from other sources that only 6 to 30 percent of us actually live out our childhood aspirations. We wish to be actors, singers, fashion designers and the prime minister, but ‘life’ kicks in and we become entrenched in the everyday, the mundane. We lose ourselves in survival, in the current of the downward stream. A current that can seem too strong to conquer, so surrender to unfulfilled dreams becomes the norm. Succumbing to the many stresses of contemporary living. Stress levels are through the roof. We are time poor and with each passing year, we cram more into the day. The age of “Being” is a luxury and we live in the age of “Doing”. Do. Do.Do. Do more, achieve more, be more. Do it, do it!
A whooping 70% in a US poll in 2013 showed were unfulfilled or disengaged in their jobs and this poll reflects the recent kiwi statistics showing that 3 out of 4 are unhappy in their jobs.
Shooting for our dreams, is it just plan impractical?
Follow a path to your future,
fulfilled and financially free
with MAGIC DUST of decadent,
dreams and desires
Make a wish
1, 2, 3
None of us seem to have a fairy god mother and a magic wand. There are pressures. Pressures from our environment, in the form of community expectations, expectations of our schools, teachers, friends, families, governments and parents. The right and wrong is told to us through the fears of our communities. The school system has a lot of influence at a deep level and many of us have the reminders of things that were said by teachers and others, “you’ll never amount to anything if you don’t get” this exam, success or certificate.
In New Zealand, success is structured around ‘title’ and education as well as status.
We are shaped by our environment, our financial and social climate, norms and expectations. We are conditioned also by our emotional journey.
We do live in a complicated world. We do seem to be encouraged to be practical and within the real limits that our world cradles us in.
Do you know what you wanted to grow up to be? Did you have within you a goal or plan that you are putting on hold for practical reasons or survival?
So where does this all leave us?
Happiness is the most important experience you can cultivate for yourself. Happiness is key and it is a choice. Prioritising happiness in the formula of your life, will bring rich reward. These rewards can be felt in areas such as relationships, physical and emotional health. And studies show happiness is directly related to motivation and performance.
“The best leaders are the ones who show their true colors not during the banner years but during times of struggle.”
― Shawn Achor,
When you identify that you are a unique person, like a snowflake. A special frequency or pattern that makes you you. This uniqueness has specialised skills and gifts that are perfect for someone else to experience and when you see that that gives you a special ‘market’. This realisation is actually pivotal in following your dreams.
NOBODY ON THE PLANET CAN DO EXACTLY WHAT YOU DO THE WAY YOU DO IT
I love this idea. This is about touching the world. Leaving your mark. Making a difference. I believe that each and every one of us, is a unique person with a unique reason for being. What if your dream (purpose)and he action of your dream was a requirement for ‘humanity’ as a whole.
What you do and the way you do it, is important. Your PURPOSE for living, what did you come here to do? Understanding your legacy or purpose is super nurturing. It links into your soul. It links into a deep truth and satisfaction within you.
Being in the now takes practice. But in the now, all worries and expectations melt away. In this space, who you are and what you truly want can whisper at you. Being in this space also allows problem solving and insights to drift in. In this space real ideas for solving the ‘dream’ can come to you. It is exciting to see this really working in life.
Flowing takes practice.
Flowing is about being at peace with where you are and knowing that you trust yourself and life to get to those dream outcomes.
Living in the present is about not thinking about the past. The mistakes, the things that have happened to hurt us or to deter our momentum. Living in the present means we should not put expectations on our future that are unrealistic and that cause us pain in the present. Being in the NOW is about self dicipline to see the relationship between our thoughts and our emotions and taking control of what we want to think and feel.
This is about releasing it all. To BE. It is about BEING and not DOING.
Beyond this being in the NOW can be about meditation as a practice.
The JOURNEY not the Destination
Enjoying the movement of your life on a daily basis. Putting your dreams and visions into the satisfaction that we can gain and we move towards our plans. The small wins and experiences that build the process of heading for our visions.
Shawn Achor prescribes a number of techniques to be happy now. One of them is to override the current feeling. By overriding how we feel toward optimism, we create a more peaceful and happy experience. When we create a more peaceful and happy experience, we create a better firing in our bodies and we reduce the stress on our thinking and we relax about where we are NOT. This is about the journey. About enjoying the experiences everyday, whether in a job we are not satisfied with or stuck in traffic. How we deal and feel about our experiences is directly related to happiness levels and to reaching our dreams.
It is important to use a diary to ‘goal post’ your dreams. Seeing progression is important. As human beings we love to create. It is innate in us. So seeing the product of our creating by mapping and tracking is important.
Set yourself wee assignments everyday to reach for that dream. It is super satisfying to see this progression. If there are too many other things to do. Make your task a small one. It is interesting to note that the task towards your dreams creates immense satisfaction and can balance the other more mundane things we do each day. This can give a LIFT and give us MOMENTUM towards our dreams.
Beware of the self talk. “I can’t”,” I shouldn’t”, ” I would never”. All the absolutes are locking your brain into the feelings of the opposite of optimism and showing a clear ‘leak’ of what your sub conscious is really about. You know the saying “Never say can’t”.
How you view your circumstances, can create ease or friction. Be careful not to be angry, sad or reluctant about the many things we do with our day. Bring a smile to every task. Practice this. This will lift your current experience and bring more momentum to your energy and your ultimate goal.
YOUR SUB CONSCIOUS
We all think we are in control. We choose, act and live our lives from feeling like we are in control. But actually our bodies (as whole functioning units, systems within systems) are governed by our subconscious and so therefore is our experience. My recent blog…shares more about this. We need to get our life on our own radar. We need to see what is serving us and what is not. Why we are not acting in the direction of fulfillment and fulfilling our dreams. By identifying and strategising to change, either through conscious work or through adopting some other therapy or therapist, will bring about the hidden reasons why we hesitate, why we don’t have confidence, why we don’t seem to get momentum even though we try hard.
This is the number 1 reason why most of us don’t even start. When we are faced with changing our norms, to reach for our potential, questions about our survival come in, we fear criticism from others. Lots of reasons ‘why not’ that are based in fear. There is nothing to fear. You must strategies this new adventure. You must consider all of the fears that drift into your mind as valid or non valid. If they are valid, you must trust yourself to find solutions. Everything has a solution.
GRATITUDE – TAKING STOCK
Be Thankful. Every day to all the great success, small and large. This is extremely important to train your brain to see the good. To take actions toward good. This creates a way for your brain to scan for opportunities, not obstacles.
Journals are great tools, in creating momentum for our dreams to manifest. Looking at where we have come and the progress is super important. Bring conscious and give yourself a ‘pat on the back’. Make sure you celebrate you, take into account all the wonderful things your have learnt, that you do and how others around you appreciate you. Make sure you do an inventory of your life and put in new practices to change what you don’t like and commit to doing what you do like.
Ego is the part of you that plays with the expectations of society. The part of you that wants to survive, and worries about it. It is a false sense of self. A part of you, that can do things against your conscience. This conscience can be about others needs or your own. Identifying and researching what the ego means can help you really lock in what you want.
In identifying your dream, it is important to reevaluate. Childhood dreams, may not be what the adult you wants. As well as dreams changing shape, we do. What we want to live a prosperous, balanced and happy life might be out of sync.
It is important to identify what drives us. Is it Love and appreciation? Is it aspire for status or a belief that no longer serves us? Is it for more time? What do you value in your life and who? What do you think is the ‘power’ in your life? What has ‘power’ over you?
NUTRITION / PHYSICIAL WELL BEING
Our bodies are bio chemical machines. Each component has a role in the whole. It is important to listen to our bodies, before the stress really hits and putting care of our physical body and physical needs is a must in the dream equation.
More and more studies are showing that lots of our health limitations can have correction or support from a balanced lifestyle with good whole fresh food, clean air and heaps of quality sleep. Keep toxins, like alcohol, smoking and artificial additives to a minimum.
TIME vs MONEY
Is time more important than money? Our time is a gift. We must priorities ourselves in the itinerary of our days. We need time to be, to think to feel to dream. It is important to make sure that our ultimate goals are not monetary. We are not machines. By taking the stance that you and your wellbeing is the pay off, abundance flows.
DON’T JUST DROP EVERYTHING
When you realise that your dreams are important, you shouldn’t just leave your day job. Balance is important. There is a real need to take care of the foundation of your life.
MAKE A PLAN today.
When you understand what you want and why, use the suggestions and make a plan. Put your plan into some visuals.
Excercise: Get a big piece of cardboard and paste pictures onto it with words. Be creative, dream it. Express it and show. Show pictures with the emotions that represent your dream being fulfilled. This is called a dream board.
When you are reminded by seeing your dream board, right beside your dressing table each morning, or on the fridge, you keep getting reminders of the motivation, to
shake up the
and make your mark the
I say reach for the stars. The stars love to hang out with us. What if the whole of your earth, was a playground for your experience? For you to love and live and dance with creation.
da Motivational Guru (a division of Decimal Guru)
UP COMING WORKSHOP
The Art and Science of Sensing, check out our facebook page for more details